| Open Mouth, Insert Foot |
[Dec. 12th, 2009|03:37 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | In The Office | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The Deep Hum Of Servers Above My Office | ] |
Okay, a little background is necessary for this one. I work in Information Systems for a hospital that employs around 4000 employees. At night, I run backups on the mainframe and some server systems, answer help desk calls, and I go out and fix computers, printers, scanners, and fax machines that go down. 48 hours of my 80 hour work week, I am the only Information Systems employee here, requiring me to be a jack of all trades at times. Another department handles Biomedical equipment, and in an emergency, I can call them out. Technically, I am not supposed to touch their equipment, as it doesn't belong to our department. I usually do fix a lot of it, as most of it isn't that different than the systems on any other network.
( The rest of the story behind the cut. ) |
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| A WTF |
[Dec. 12th, 2009|01:52 am] |
(If there are any spelling errors or grammar mistake,please tell me. I don't want to upset anyone)
Back story: I work in kettle corn at Santa's wonderland, It's a western town and drive-thu light show. We give free samples of the corn in little cups. The little cups we get come from the kitchen.(this is important---->) To get in to the kitchen you have to go though two doors. The first door goes in to the drink room then there a door that opens to the part were they cook. The drink rooms not very big.
The WTF: We ran out of the little cups tonight so I was sent to the kitchento get more. As I am walking up I see a grown women crouching near the first door. My thoughts are she hurt , I run up to her asking if her if she needs help. She calmly replied "No we're ok". My fears are subsided but then I do a double take. The women was hiding/protecting a child backside who looks about 2 to 4 and is peeing ....into the drink room. I understand he was young and our bathroom are in a odd spot but he was peeing in a high traffic area and near drinks products! And it was gross! |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|11:02 pm] |
On the very-likely chance you've forgotten, I'm in your big box bookstore, training your booksellers and being supervisory (sometimes I'm in your Contemporary Arts Museum, selling your drink tickets, but not today):
Today was mostly great, but I had the unfortunate opportunity to meet someone who has left me with the faint taste of bile in my throat.
( At least she tried to warn me )
tl;dr: PERVERTS, I don't like them. |
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| The ULTIMATE suck and WTF?! |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|11:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Dream Police | ] |
I work as a journalist in Indianapolis. Recently, I wrote an article about how Congress is considering banning products designed to help an individual get a false negative on a drug test. That's when I found this beauty.
A Pittsburgh-area man and woman went into a convenience store. The woman (this is important) was about to take a pre-employment urine test. The man had peed into a container earlier, but the urine had cooled off. They decided they needed to warm it up back to body-temperature level.
The store's microwave seemed perfect for the job.
They asked the clerk to heat the sample. That in and of itself qualifies as suck, but that's not the suckiest part. You'll notice I didn't say what the container was.
The container was a hollow, realistic-looking prosthetic body part which happens to rhyme with the name of the second planet from the Sun.
All I can say is it would be safe to suspect drugs were involved.
The poor clerk apparently thought it was a real one and called the police. The couple were cited with criminal mischief and disorderly conduct. The woman plea-bargained and reimbursed the chain for the cost of a new microwave.
I often joke that every time I think I've seen it all, someone comes along to prove me wrong. I'm almost afraid to wonder what's next. On the positive side, if the woman doesn't grasp basic anatomy, she hopefully won't breed. |
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| international wtf |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|07:05 pm] |
I was talking to a guy about a week ago who was booking a week to the Bahamas. Whenever we make reservations, we have to read information about the hotel/area so they can't later call in and complain about stuff. Anyway, I got to the bottom of this particular hotel's info, and there's a quick note about people needing passports to travel to the Bahamas.
I could tell his heart just sank, because he just said, "...oh," in such a sad way. Followed up with, "Well I'm looking at the website right now and it says I don't need a passport for the Bahamas, or anywhere in the Caribbean, so let's go ahead and book it."
...
I told him no, let's not book it, you won't be able to board a plane, let's look for something else.
So he says, "Ok. Let's look at Cancun."
. . .
lather, rinse, repeat
He ended up asking for about 10 more things (all in the Caribbean/Mexico) and then telling me "the website" says he doesn't need a passport. I never did get out of him what website he was looking at, but at the end of the call, we ended up just booking Orlando, FL. |
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| Please take your anger out on the shop girl, because she obviously invented the store policy |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|09:52 pm] |
I worked in a department store in London and so i have had plenty of experience with sucky customers. These are two of my personal favourites though
1.
We were a concession in a department store and it is stated on the back of the receipt that we cannot refund items from stand alone stores. So, despite the fact our computers belonged to the department store and were nothing to do with our stand alone store tills, i'd say we had about 15 customers a week try to refute the claim that that we could not do anything about refunding their transaction. "But i bought it from *, they said we could take it back to any * store". I understand, but they made a mistake. "BUT THEY SAID WE COULD".
Oh i'm sorry, i am definitely saying no JUST TO ANNOY YOU, why don't i just take the money from the till and write out a little receipt myself!? And then, you know, get busted and sacked.
2.
ME: Okay, let me just refund that for you...*5 minutes later* because the refund is over £50 i will have to get someone higher up to authorise it.
Customer: Can't you just authorise it yourself? I'm in a hurry. What are you doing? I just want a refund!
Hey, customer, please stop telling me what to do on the till, if you know what to do why don't you come round here and put in the magic number yourself?
Me: No i'm sorry, i'm going to have to get someone but can you just give me your name first?
C: It's on the back of the card!!!
Me: You've already put your card in the machine, the card IS IN THE MACHINE.
*I come back with a manager*
C: Yes i think you HAD better get someone else to help you seeing as you can't do it yourself!
Me: I can it's just i need someone to authorise it...
C: *says to my manager* she doesn't have a clue does she!? |
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| *headdesk* Couple of minor, witnessed sucks... |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|07:47 pm] |
Recap: Me = benefits phone monkey.
( Don't be an idiot... )
(tl;dr - customer misses appointments, has claim closed, baws about the advisors "not finding him a job" and threatens criminal damage - peppered with some delightful swearing)
( *facepalm* )
(tl;dr - woman tells us she lives with her partner. Her partner comes on the line shouting, swearing and insisting she doesn't. Woman comes back on the line to attempt to make my co-worker commit benefit fraud. Swears when denied)
I despair for some people -__- |
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| I should get special discount because I'm AMERICAN!! |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|06:38 pm] |
Urgh, I hardly ever post here and now it's nearly Christmas I post here all the time. Figures.
I live in a small, tourist town in England and we get a lot of tourists from all over the world here. The biggest selling point is the popular castle and the surrounding areas are also full of history and tourist-infected areas. The supermarket that I work in is quite close by to several very English styled guest houses, so naturally all the tourists come into my workplace to buy their groceries.
I have to say this before I start - I really like Americans and most Americans I've met are really lovely people, so this woman in no way affected my judgement in the slightest. She was just... weird. Anyway, here's the conversation we had.
Me: Friendly neighbourhood cashier,
CL: Crazy lady
CL approaches my checkout with no items, looking rather frustrated.
CL: Why is everything so expensive?
Me: Oh, is it? We have a lot of things on offer, maybe you'd like to have a look at those?
CL: Even all of those are expensive... I wanted milk, but it's £2.70, thats like, $4 to me.
Me: Mmm, it is expensive in England if you're from America.
CL: Do you think someone could make it cheaper for me, seeing as I'm American? I've never paid $4 for milk in my life!
Me: Sorry, the prices are fixed!
She had a big stress at this point about how expensive it all was, how it was disgusting that we had to put up with such expensive prices for everything. Tbh, the £2.70 milk was 6 pints of milk, our most expensive one, and thats a fairly good price for 6 pints of milk here. I have no idea if $4 is expensive for 6 pints of milk in the states, but I'm sure it's different wherever you go. Anyway, she eventually caved in to buying the £2.70 milk at full price and went to grab the bottle and came straight back to my queue. No issues putting it through... until we had to pay.
Me: Ok thats £2.70!
CL then hands me $4! Not pounds, but dollars!
Me: Umm, Im sorry, I can't accept dollars, only pounds...
CL: What?! Why not, thats the right amount just in dollars.
Me: Yes, but... well, we don't accept foreign money in here, just Pounds Sterling...
CL: But I'm not foreign, I'm AMERICAN! (This is my favourite line in this conversation)
Me: Ma'am, we don't accept any money that isn't Pounds Sterling.
CL: I went to the castle yesterday and THEY accepted my dollars! We all speak English! I don't HAVE any pounds!
(I know for a fact that the castle doesnt accept anything other than Pounds sterling and Euros, because I used to WORK there and I still know most of the managers socially. They do have a currency exchange machine put in recently, so I assume thats what she's used.)
Me: The castle have a currency exchange machine, purhaps they used that with you?
CL: NO, they accepted my DOLLARS. ARGH, England is USELESS and RACIST you should accept my Dollars because its AMERICAN. Where is your manager?!
I called my manager over, he told her exactly the same thing I told her and she shouted at him at how I called her foreign and she's not from "some country like Iraq, I'm from AMERICA and thats not foreign at all!" Urgh. She got kicked out without milk. I dread to think what the rest of her stay in England is going to be like if she refuses to pay in pounds like that -_-
EDITed because I can't spell :P
EDITed again because I generally fail at most writing-like activties today. |
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| buying things does require money |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|08:08 am] |
No need for background information, this script will explain everything:
Z: Zombianca!
C: Customer
Z: Now, in order to set up your account we will need a valid credit or debit card.
C: Okay, do you accept pre-paid cards?
Z: Yes.
C: Okay the card number is 23354678461687684646854
Z: Thank you, so you wanted the $30 package, correct?
C: Yes ma'am
Z: Great, let me get the security code on that card.
C: It's 5464651464
Z: Okay and to verify we will be charging $30 even to the card, okay?
C: Yes, that is correct.
Z: Alright, I am charging it now.... Oh, ma'am I'm sorry, it's not letting me authorize that transaction... I can try a diff-
C: Oh, that's probably because there's no money on that card.
Z: *headdesk*
C: Do I need money on the card for it to go through?
Z: ...yes, ma'am in order for a prepaid card to work for making purchases, there needs to be money on the card.
C: That's what I thought.
Z: *headesk x100000000000000000000000*
sigh. |
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| How don't you know!? |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|09:16 am] |
I just remembered a gem from about a year ago, when I worked at a different UPS Store from where I'm at now.
I should point something out. I do NOT work for "COURIER COMPANY". I work for THE COURIER COMPANY STORE. Anyone who works for TUP*S understands that this is something you say at least five times a week. I do not drive a truck, I do not deliver your packages, I DO NOT WORK FOR COURIER COMAPNY. I don't expect people to understand this upon walking in, but it usually takes me explaining once to get them to understand. Well, not this fellar.
Script format, obviously not verbatim as it's been a year.
US: Tara, my co-worker, or myself
M: Man who is lost
M: *stumbles in, runs up to our counter* Do you know where the travel agent's office is around here?
US: Uhm, no sorry sir. Neither of us live here, and we only come up to this part of town for work. Do you know the name of the office? Maybe we can look it up for you online?
M: I don't know! How do you not know where it is?!
US: Sorry sir, we just don't!
M: But you're COURIER COMPANY, you deliver packages how do you NOT know where it is?
US: *aha* Sir, I'm sorry, but we're not COURIER COMPANY, we're the *** Store. I know it sounds a little silly, but we're not the same. We don't deliver packages, we just ship them out.
M: That's bullshit! How can you do your job if you don't know where it is! I have an appointment at this agency and I'm going to be late because you don't know where it is!
US: *buh, blank stare* Ok well, we are unable to help you. Good luck, though! Sorry!
Seriously, what?! You have an appointment with an agency that you have obviously contacted and you don't know the address or the NAME of said agency. And this is our fault? Oh, ok.
We've always had a no b-s policy at the stores I've worked at. You're an ass, we stop helping which is why we stopped... not that there was more we could do, seeing as our memory-recovery machine was being repaired that week.
EDITED to cover my butt by removing names |
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| Chock full O nuts! |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|12:55 am] |
Alright, so I never post here any more and that's a good thing, but today this man just made me so irritated.
Recap: I'm a customer service clerk at a New England based grocery store chain.
( I WANT CASH!!! ) |
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| a customer scammer douche and a customer "um wtf dude?" |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|10:55 pm] |
Hello there again, hopefully this will make up for my last sucky post?
I love this job, I really do. My customers can be SO sweet, but alas thats where you can be taken for granted =/
It was near the end of my shift, 8 pm, no one was around, a guy came up to my register... and lets make this short.
( MOAR )
Heres the customer wtf, not in script mode because I forgot what he said exactly.
A normal ol' joe comes through my line and has some organic...something with him, or vegetarian something. I think he's buying it for a friend if I remember right? I comment on how my sister was doing a vegetarian thing lately, just trying veggie dishes and such.
Well soon he goes on a tirade about "yeah damn tree huggers!" and talks about how "global warming is stupid and look how cold it is and its so stupid and doesn't exist" and walks out.
I just want to know what vegetarians and global warming have to do with each other?
when he leaves and no ones looking, I laugh so hard. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|02:22 am] |
I posted earlier but I've just remembered this suck from about a week or so ago.
I live fairly near to where I work at a supermarket in a small town. Literally, it's a five minute walk from the store to my house. As such, most of my neighbours know me and will smile and nod as I walk past them on the way to or from work, or if they're in the store and see me.
One paticular customer though, decided to ask me a work related question when I was half way on my way to work. In fact, he saw me walk past his house, came running out and stopped me, complaining to me about a particular member of staff who served him last time he was shopping there and demanded that I talk to my manager about them. I said I'd make sure to mention it, as the complaint was a reasonable one and was about to go on my way, when he now decided to ask me if I could drop in a pint of milk for him after I'd finished my shift! Errm... no. First, you're not gonna give me any money for this process, second I finish after the store closes, third, I'm not a delivery girl and fourthly, you live two minutes away from the store. You can SEE the store from your window. All you have to do to get there is CROSS A ROAD. Get a damn pint of milk yourself.
I ended up being a little late for work because of this guy.
Similar story: About a month after I started working there, after my shift, I was waiting for a bus in my uniform when a lady stopped me and asked me where I could find the biscuits in store. And when I go into the competitions store if I'm wearing my uniform which is a COMPLETELY different colour to their store, I still get people asking me questions about where stuff is. *sigh* |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 10th, 2009|08:26 pm] |
I work for a United States representative, as an intern. No Monica Lewinsky jokes plz. I'm cute, but I'm a boy. As such, I prefer Mark Foley jokes. Hah.
Basically I answer phones, help write letters and research issues, and various other things.
( As an intern, I encounter much WHARRGARBL. )
All in all though, my job rocks and I'm lucky to have it. I'd suggest a congressional internship to anyone with a semester to kill. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 11th, 2009|01:02 am] |
I work in a supermarket. I'm usually on checkouts but I've migrated over to the meat and fish counters. I get more confused people here, because it's at the back of the store and people are always coming over to ask questions about where stuff is.
( Cut for length ) |
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| NO Microsoft did not brick your console! |
[Dec. 10th, 2009|06:49 pm] |
Let m ebegin by statting that I work in a game store. A few days ago I took a call on a system repair. Seems the guy calling was convinced that Microsoft had bricked his Xbox 360 with the E-74 failure. I asked said person why he thought that, and he responded that he had a modded box so he could play stole... er burned games. He actually giggled at his Freduian slip.
I proceeded to tell him that no Microsoft did not brick his system at all. He said he wanted it in for repair, I told him how we do that. He then told me that it was also banned from Xbox Live ( for being a thief who got caught . He wanted to know if we could fix that, and we explained we could not since MS locked him out perm style. He then had the gall to ask us how he could hack past MS because he had invested too much time into his stolen games.
I explained to him that since MS had caught his, his data was corrupt, and his system perma banned and NOTHING could undo that. This seemed to upset him greatly, and after a 10 minute conversation on this whole ordeal, I informed him, that well microsoft treats thieves that way, sucks to be you. And it was over right? RIGHT? Nope.
He came into work yesterday to complain about how we could not unbrick his system from live, and how we refused to unban him because his system was modded. Fortunately one of the owners got him and had been warned about him. She listened quietly and patiently to the thief?idiot bitch and complain. She then as nice as she could be told him there was nothing we could do to fix it. And him getting a hardware failure after being banned was karma for being a thief.
He finally left after 10 more minuets of all of us telling him that nothing could be done, and even customers sold him how fucked he was. By the time he left people were openly laughing at him for being a no system banned thief and modder. I am sure he will complain to corperate, but since we are a franchise, its an official... WHATEVER! |
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| *grumble grumble* me me ME! |
[Dec. 10th, 2009|03:51 pm] |
I know I just posted but another came to mind:
We take donations for St. Judes childrens hospital. Its a wonderful organization and I've heard some wonderful stories about all the work they do. Some people donate and some people don't. I understand all that but please, if I ask you of you would like to donate, don't be a dick about it.
Some examples:
- "no! And I don't care!!"
- "where the f*ck were YOU when I needed help with paying for my cancer treatments?!"
- "just shut up right now, I don't want anything you're selling!" says the guy with a cart full of stuff I'm selling.
And my favorite: "oh no thanks. All of MY kids are healthy."
tis the season to be charitable.
Post from mobile portal m.livejournal.com |
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| for real? you dont say! |
[Dec. 10th, 2009|01:09 pm] |
Ok so. We have a savers card that we offer to every customer. If you tell us you don't want one, we accept that and back off. But please don't lie to me by saying that you're in a hurry and need to leave then proceed to do the following:
- write a check ve r y s l o w l y.
- answer your phone that just rang and then proceed to stand there having a very LOUD conversation for 10 minutes after I rang you up (not only are you in the way of the other customers but um... Weren't you in a hurry?)
- look at what the next customer is holding and realize that you had forgotten to grab that particular item and hold up the line to go fetch it as well as 15 more items you so desperately needed.
I'm no English professor but doesn't "I'm in a hurry" mean that well, you're in a hurry?
Yeesh.
Post from mobile portal m.livejournal.com |
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| It's on the door you have to look at as you enter. |
[Dec. 10th, 2009|02:20 am] |
A couple short sucks and a major WTF from the last couple of weeks at work. In no particular order.
No, ma'am, you can't bring your dog into the store. Store policy is "no pets except service animals". The (admittedly cute) elaborately groomed little long-haired lapdog you're carrying under your arm is clearly not a service animal; ergo, you cannot bring it into the store. You ignored the sign on the door, so I have to inform you verbally. Giving me a frosty look, then snapping "Forget it!" at the employee trying to get you into the service queue, then turning on your overpriced heel and storming out with your nose in the air won't change store policy. You'll get the same response at our other locations, too. Next time just leave the dog at home.
The restrooms are available to any customer who asks after them. Grumbling to me as I show you to them, as they're in the back section of the store, that spending x amount of money should mean you're "entitled to use the bathroom" as though we hold the restrooms hostage until you buy a bunch of useless techno garbage doesn't make you less of a tool. Continuing to grumble and expecting me to sympathise with your plight doesn't, either. Grow the fuck up.
Lastly, you. You can arse yourself to get out of the car and come into buy junk, but when your grandchild needs the restroom, you suddenly can't sit up, much less leave the car, so your first response is to pull into the alleyway behind the store and have said grandchild stand their while you unfasten her trousers so she can relieve herself right there in the alleyway. Oh my gods, what the fuck is wrong with you? It is well after nightfall, we don't exactly have a low crime rate in this part of town, and you'd rather your young grandchild drop her trousers in a dark alleyway and urinate in public than get your lazy ass out of the car and walk her back into the store to use the nice, clean, well-lit, safe restroom. I'm not supposed to walk her back in for you – I am not a babysitter while on duty – but I will anyway because what the fucking fuck?! On the highly unlikely chance I get fired for this, I'll be damned glad it was this and not being a nervous moron in front of the company owner.
I hate people so much sometimes. |
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